I've been wanting to photograph three finished projects and post about one of them since last week, the fact I managed to shoot not even one of them made me bitchier than usual.
YOU ARE WARNED.
But enough about me, let's dive into this review of "Sewing Rectangles Magazine":
You have your sheer rectangle with rectangle-shaped seams and a bow....
The rectangle shirt with asymmetrical hem and rectangular sleeves...
The rectangular lace top with a rectangular lining...
The rect.... WOT?!
A rectangular sleeveless sweater with a rectangular panel of lace peeking out and a triangular cutout?
OH MY GOD! I've been waiting all my life for this!
But if you're a plus-sized lady, don't be afraid, Burda will help you look as big, boxy and dowdy as you can:
If a model can look this bad in these clothes, so can you!
If you're eyes aren't hurting enough yet, feast on these granny panties: they're perfect to look as if you're wearing a diaper!
And what about this little number? They were so kind as to style it as tragically as usual, so that we just couldn't ignore how ugly it is!
The funny thing is, if you chop this pattern at the waist, it makes one the few patterns I like in this issue:
Cute, right? What a difference a ruffled hem makes...
And these two are probably the only two other things that picked my interest in this issue (the second one being a vintage pattern... duh), although I'm too consumed by my own sarcasm to give them a decent commentary.
Seriously, guys... WTF? The FIVE "variation on a rectangle" patterns could be a new low for Burda.
Am I right?
I am SO glad I didn't renew my subscription...